**** trigger warning *****

December. I think it’s officially my least favorite month now. On our birthday / anniversary I purposely overdosed on lithium. I calculated enough out to cause damage but not to kill myself.

I called 911 for myself. I spoke with a coworker who had to listen to me heave. My daughter saw me deteriorating in front of her tiny toddler eyes. My wife did the dishes, sobbing. I was dying.

I was taken to the hospital and monitored overnight. Tacycardic and disoriented. They pumped me full of fluids, 8 bags in total I think.

I was released the next day and have since been getting intensive help with my therapist and medication.

I’m currently in a mixed state, but school is going well and I’ve been sleeping the last two days so hope is on the horizon.

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15 thoughts on “Flash back to December

      1. Disability would be good but if you want some tips on how to manage the house while struggling to get through each day, I have done it. Email me if you want to talk about it and work out some ideas.

  1. I’m so sad for you – the pain you feel must be immeasurable. I’m glad you are getting help now and I hope you don’t ever feel so low that you need to make that choice again. ❤

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