**** trigger warning *****
December. I think it’s officially my least favorite month now. On our birthday / anniversary I purposely overdosed on lithium. I calculated enough out to cause damage but not to kill myself.
I called 911 for myself. I spoke with a coworker who had to listen to me heave. My daughter saw me deteriorating in front of her tiny toddler eyes. My wife did the dishes, sobbing. I was dying.
I was taken to the hospital and monitored overnight. Tacycardic and disoriented. They pumped me full of fluids, 8 bags in total I think.
I was released the next day and have since been getting intensive help with my therapist and medication.
I’m currently in a mixed state, but school is going well and I’ve been sleeping the last two days so hope is on the horizon.