As many of you may know I have bipolar disorder. Some of you may not know that I have been having a difficult time lately with it. The hardest part right now is dealing with the depression aspect. One of the major challenges of bipolar disorder is how to handle depression. For many people, such as myself, an anti-depressant causes me to be hypo-manic. (meaning high amounts of energy, motivation, irritability, high sex drive, etc.) Of course everyone is different, and SSRI’s tend to cause this more than an SR antidepressant.

I am currently on a mood stabilizer called Lamictal:
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0000957/
It basically evens out my moods, or is supposed to. It works really well when I am going to head into a straight on mania, but sometimes it doesn’t help with the depression.

Currently I am in a mixed phase, meaning I’m not super depressed but slightly manic as well. Its pretty intense sometimes and I am generally feeling as though I want to explode! This is an accurate illustration:

How I feel

Its a weird feeling, and I know its in my head, which sounds cliche, but its true. But I feel it everywhere in my body and I HATE IT!

Anyway. Until next time,
Jen

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